And then came Wednesday, that only happens once a week so let's enjoy it!!! Each day is a gift, don't forget that.

My week so far has been great. Took a long morning walk it was great. The weather here is so nice, it's really my never ending summer. I can even take a swim in the pool later this afternoon with the kids if I want, It'll be around 30 C today.

 Went to the Au pair meeting on Monday, was cool we went bowling. Met a lot off new people and the funniest was that I met a girl that is new in the area from Sweden. She did stalk up my Facebook page before so when I walked in she knew directly that it was me haha. She's from Falun which is like a little bit more than an hour from my hometown, Mora in Sweden. So awesome to have someone to speak some Swedish with! Met her yesterday in the morning for some pick-nick whit her little baby that she takes care off, super-cuuute. Then we went to the movies yesterday evening and saw a comedy. funfunfun
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I just finished the whole California Driver's Licenses book. Have my test tomorrow morning, I wish myself the best luck. I really hope that I can make it my first try, I've been putting some effort to understand everything as much as possible. I don't want to spend more money then necessary on this test, I wanna start saving up for so much things. Like my two weeks vacation which I didn't start planning for much yet but I want to be prepared when times comes. Been talking with Denise and Martina about Hawaii. How amazing wouldn't that be??

 Also I need to figure out what I want to study. I remember that I needed to put in some money myself last year when I was studying in Virginia even though my host-family must pay 500 dollars. I'm looking up my possibility's for bible studies I'm not sure If I can do that for my 6 credits that Cultural Care wants me do to but we'll see. I'm just very interested in understanding what I'm reading now. Think bible studies will help my thinking a lot.

Christmas is coming up, well we have Halloween and Thanksgiving first. But for that I didn't plan much. I tried to start a conservation with my host-parents about Christmas cause I know my family from Sweden wants to come visit me. Didn't see them for more then a year, miss them sooo much so really hope that they can come!!!

I have a bunch off things what I need money to do. I wanna cut my hair, fix my guitar just called and they said it will cost more than 20 dollars..., then I need to buy new make up, save up for taxes that I will have to pay for this year I guess around 600 dollars which is a lot... And I want to pay my mom back some money cause they have been backing me up. Then I have to have money for the vacation I'll soon have when Sarah and Sofie from Sweden will visit and we'll got to La and Las Vegas.

I don't know how I'll manage to do all off this, but I guess I try to save everything I can. At least I have a plan now what I need and want. I need to be more strict and think more so I think this plan is great.
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Keep smiling
Life is Good
When you feel like you have a bad day
try to see a least one good thing in it
Laugh, love and live

Things to think about..

An optimist laughs to forget a pessimist forgets to laugh.

Instead of complaining that the rosebush is full of thorns, be happy that the thorn bush is full of roses. Looking for good in situations often brings about positive outcomes. And the opposite is also true. Seek the gather roses rather than thorns, sunshine rather than clouds.

What if pain becomes life lessons to learn and suffering provides us with assignment to master and endurance tests to pass. What if we welcome and embrace pain and suffering? What if we consider them as training ground to grow and learn in preparation for a unique purpose in life. The training ground becomes the source for blessings. Blessings erupt in abundance as we shift our paradigm from pain and despair into possibilities and hope, and trails and triumph. Are you willing to be a student of hope with the greatest blessings or a holder of despair?

I'm learning to allow suffering in my life. Trying to see it in a different view. Things can appear to be bad and negative but I'm trying to just turn it upside-down and see something good in it. I can learn from every situation that I'm in. Sometimes I feel that when I'm around people that are very stressed about something or worried that I get in the same mood. Then I just have to stop for a moment and look at the situation, If I feel like it's not me that have the bad feeling I try to break the negative stress pattern, cause it's easy to get drawn in to it.

peace out

Just watched the movie Letters to Juliet 2. When It comes to romantic movies and love stories I just can't help myself either smiling so hard it hurts or crying until there's no more tears. I know it's all made up but I feel it so strong, I try not to watch them to often cause it's a little bit painful and It always end up with me crying even more after the movie is done with the feeling that I want the same love in my life hahaha, true story. foreveralone.com. But actually this time it wasn't tooo bad, because I'm actually full of love at the moment. Feels great!

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Either way, I had a awesome weekend I must say that. Was off work so tried to use my free-time best possible. Went out dancing on Friday evening with my two Frenchies and a girl from China. Was fun going out, very good music and danced a lot. Same place me and Carole went last weekend. I spend Saturday hanging out with a friend, playing b-ball very relaxing. Had a quiet evening, went to bed kind off early but I was super-tired so It was fine. Woke up early on Sunday to go to church with Carole. Was a very good service, felt like a got some new strength and power for this week! After church I went for lunch with three girls from France, one from Germany and on from Colombia. Had a great time and in the evening we went ti Caroles house for a movie night. Good way to end the weekend. When I came home last night I was exhausted so went straight to bed.
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Tonight is my second Au pair meeting, we'll go bowling. Think it will be fun, so around 7pm my frenchie Mary will come get me and I drive with her and some other girls there. Have a meeting at DMV to try to get my California driver's license this Thursday. Been studying the book for a while because it's 40 questions and a lot of people say it's hard to pass the test the first time. I can't even afford to pay more then one time so I'll defiantly do my best.

Don't have more plans than that so far, got my schedule yesterday and I work a little bit this weekend. It's all good. Looking forward to Martina's visit though, she's coming soon! Talked with Denise today almost an hour, she's now in her new host-family, wish her the best luck!
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Notes from Church

Gods word in a broken world
God values you

Offering Ourselves and our gifts
Teach us to use your gifts wisely and share them generously

Swallow your pride
We can't forgive ours
Jesus will forgive us

Don't think less of yourself
but thinking of yourself less

Root of the fruit

Unity-humility

humility- not thinking less of yourself but value others above yourself

Division-pride
admit pride, rest in Jesus power
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Things to think about...

Don't let your days be like driving on freeways, fast and thoughtless. The next time you go over a speed bump soak in your surroundings and find one thing that you can appreciate for the day.

With a firm faith you can go weather any storm when it comes your way in life. Are you laying the foundation for a solid faith?

Your unfailing love will last forever! Young and old will hear of your faithfulness.

Upon what conditions do you give your love? Or is love a condition of good behavior? When someone we love does things or make decision we disagree with, that's not the time to use love as a tool for manipulation. Unconditional love is pure and everlasting regardless of behavior. Is there anyone who doesn't deserve your love? That's exactly the person you should focus on loving.


I need to keep myself motivated to think positive, sometimes everything seems to go just really the wrong way. Like I've crash and burned, But I'm the only one who can change my attitude against the situation and I have the power to change direction. Never to loose faith that and knowing that I'm not alone. I'll walk through hard times stronger then before and I'll keep spreading my love to everyone I can, I have a lot to give!


Peace out amigos

I started to get some comments on my blog, very fun to read! I appreciate feedback a lot, If someone is interested to ask questions or whatever,
 my is e-mail, hanna.aandersson@live.se 
Kinda made my morning reading some comments today to be honest. Even if It seems to kinda go direct to my trashcan but found it today when I looked at the settings.

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Anyway,
I decided this morning that I was going to have a awesome morning and a good restoftheday. And so far so good I must say that. I woke up 30 min before I was suppose to go up, I was in panic because I thought I'd overslept but, no. So instead of going back to sleep as I usually would have done I took time to pray and think about how I'm going to see everything positive today.

I think I spread some love around the house this morning, the first thing I did was to smile to every each family member and asked if they slept good and wished them a extra good morning. I can very silly and super-happy sometimes and why not share. Everyone was extra nice back and it felt real. Then I had a super delicious breakfast, black coffee cause I forgot the milk, hahah, yogurt, fresh strawberries and nuts. It was so yummy!!!

Kids where good the whole morning, helped them with a bath since they have their pictures taken today. We skipped, ran and jumped all the way to school, they are so fun to be with when they have their good mood. Then after dropping them off I took a long walk around the whole town, stopped before I returned home at a store to bought some kind of lunch, came out with a veggie sandwich and ate it in the park before going all the way home. It was so good, more like a Breakfast-lunch-dinner, still full! Had a nice moment in the park, sat alone on a bench, like a little pick-nick and just enjoyed the nature.


I must admit the last couple of days was hard in many ways. I felt like it was project surviving for a moment, (yes I'm very dramatic) I felt so tired of everything I was about to give up this whole Au pair thing.
But I mean really for a moment,
like 30 seconds,
cause I'm not a person who just gives up. So instead of get buried in self pity I took care of my problems  And look at this wonderful day, everything just feels awesome right now just like I wanted it to! Yeyyy me.

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So now I'm gonna share some of my thoughts to you, maybe some one else is feeling down or just like reading and sneaking in other peoples life's, lol.
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Once up on a time there was a little Hanni Montani. She felt concern over a thought that kept going around in her head. She is a girl that thinks a lot, and when she get started it can end up anywhere sometimes it's about how can you move the whole world to try to live on another planet. What would be the best way to transport people there, or should you try to make babies over there and create a new world. And so on.....

But this day she thought about this,
Is everything happening for a reason, is everything written, is your sin and mistakes written? Is it already meant for you to make mistakes  so you can learn from them and that will in the end form your whole life, Is it already written who's going to get saved, Is nothing my decisions  do I have a destiny, do I have a say in it at all, can I change, Is bad choices meant to be apart of my life, Is it then not bad, cause it was meant to happen or is it apart of everything to feel regret, should feeling of wanting to change something move us forward in life?????

 It really never ended, the list got longer and longer... Hanni Montani felt confused, what to do? She asked three persons, one person that is doing tons of bible studies and are very smart, the second a awesome friend of mine and last my fantastic mom that have answers for everything.

They all had almost the same answer and they are all Christians. It's a mix, some things are destiny, like some things that are meant for you will not pass, rely on God that he will be there backing you up and that he will not put more to you than God know you can handle. You have free will, you can make choices and you can do wrong and that will get you consequences.

That made the girl with a lot of thoughts in her head very happy in relaxed. She kept thinking and she decided that what the people said match her too. It's your choice to believe, trust and to understand. The Holy Ghost will always lead you on the right way if you choose to listen. If you're divided to make the right choice you can always pray to make the right one. Listen to your inner, If you don't take time to listen or you know it's wrong and you do it anyway that will give you consequences.

Sometimes it's hard even for Hanni Montani to not get stressed out when she sees everything around her falling apart, she might simply not know what to do, what's right or wrong, maybe she's just about to learn. She needs to remember that sometimes God will test you, he will see how you react in these kinds of situation to see if you relay on him and stay true in your faith.

You must not always know why some things are happening or why you feel a certain way or why you do something. Because you can come to a point later on when you can look back and understand. That happened to Hanni sooo many times, and it wasn't always things happened for a personal gain. It was sometimes for someone else, so don't think only about yourself, it can be affecting another person as well.

To end this serious story about how funny life is I want to say

Life is Good,
God is Good
Trust and Hope
It's not bad until you make it bad
There's a light somewhere in the dark,
just open your eyes and listen
Don't stop believing
you're not alone!


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Didn't write for a while, been busy moving from the house I lived in for like 3 weeks since I first came here to San Francisco. We didn't move far, just like 5 min car ride from the old house. This house is pretty cool, Jacuzzi and pool at the backside. My room is nice, have a great awesome closet. Love it, except from that it's next to kids room so no Skype after 7 pm and pretty much no crying, talking in phone, berating etc, lol. Just how this life is, I'm use to live in a house with a big family where I'm not always in the center so this is going to work out.
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This weekend was actually really good, little sleep but loads of fun-time. Started off pretty nice on Thursday evening with a trip with Carole to two clubs at a area which is full of students from the University in Berkeley. Had a great time, came home late everyday and was kinda tired on Friday morning but it was all good. Had some coffee in the morning and long walks. Went back to the same places both Friday and Saturday! Danced a lot, met new people so only good. Will probably be a place to go back to some weekends.

Worked on Saturday morning cause my host-mom was in LA. Just took kids to the park and played for a while and then  made some lunch. After work I went to Richmond on a church-event, got invited from a person I met out the night before. Was great, with a choir, lots of people, good atmosphere, food and stuff. Might go back there this Saturday on their church-service. I also went to play some basketball ate some Mexican food and look at the nice view over the bay area. So Saturday was a good day!
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Sunday was the moving-day  was really a lot off stuff to get over here, don't know how many truck loads them came with. Went to church in the middle of everything and then came back and was kinda working until the evening even if I wasn't on schedule. Got my room all done, felt good to pack up for real this time, or at least hopefully for one year. In the last house I didn't really unpack cause I knew I where moving soon. Went to sleep before 8 pm and slept 13 hours in pure exhaustion. Woke up and felt kinda confused and very mashed potatoes head. But guess I needed that long sleep.

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Yesterday, Monday, kids had no school. So first I helped unpacking stuff and tried to help as much as possible. Then I took kiddos to lunch and after we went to see a movie at the movie theater, we saw Hotel Transylvania. I'm so loud when I watch movies, can't help myself laugh loudest of everyone. I can even here that some people laugh at my laugh hahhaa, but it's just funny. When movie was done we went home and jumped in the pool and after it was time for bed. Really good day, felt how I connected a little with all of them, we had like a whole day of fun. Had some dance-parties in the car, where racing in the stairs, jump to all the white-parts on the cross-walk and so on.

Took a long walk around 2 hours after work, felt good to just come out a little bit. Talked in the phone, listen to music and just had a nice time. Really do love walking, but I know I should be careful when I'm out, some areas here is pretty scary after 8 pm.

Today I got confirmed from my host mom that Martina can come visit me over the weekend in the end of this month. She'll fly back and forth from LA, Three weeks left, I can't wait. Miss her so much, will be so awesome to see my Martini Granini again!!!

Also Aishling, my Irish mummy, called the other day, felt good to talk to her again. She was the one driving me to the airport on my last day in Virginia, was so hard to say goodbye. She's my best friend, a person I'll never forget and hopefully will see ASAP again. She's also extending her Au pair year so she might also get a place her in California, really hope so. Either way wish her the best where ever life takes her.

Denise, came a couple of weeks before me to LA, also my best friend who I met in Virginia. She went in to re-match which means you are going in the process under maximum 2 weeks to find a new host-family because it's for some reason not working out or you'll have to go back home to your country.  She called me with the good news that she found a new family, 5 min from Martina's house. So happy for her, know this will be great for her!


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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dbNK50T35wY


Wanna share my notes from church with y'all
maybe someone can find it useful!
The main subject was LOVE


The center is the Love of God
What is Love
God is Love,
Love is God

A lot of people feel like their prayers could be different
It's nothing wrong about praying about learning how to pray
The preacher was funny and said: Teach us how to pray, teach us how to pray
funny to me, I'm referring to the song: teach me how to dougie for the people ever heard about that one, lol

You should search for a close personal relationship with God
A christian life of Love and God
Accept that you maybe don't know God
And try to get to know him
Blessed are those who knows they don't know God

Loves nature
Love needs knowledge and insight of Gods story
Everything, creating of the world, story of Jesus,
his healing, died on the cross and came back from the dead
also the insight of the holy spirit
It's vital and important
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A little part from the book Philippians
that I like and think about a lot

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others
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Abound more and more in love,
pure integrity and glory of God.

It's not what I get
It's what I give
How can I give power away to help other people.
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Finally,
Love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy not boast
Love is not proud, it's not rude. it's not self-seeking, not angry
It keeps no records of wrong
Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices in the truth
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres,
Love never fails, Faith hope and love remain
But the greatest of these is Love






And now what you all have been waiting for,
Shaaaring my lifeexperince tiiiiime! ! ! ! !




Seriously, I think I've had a really messed up view of Love during a long time. I've always seen it only between people falling in love with each other  I've been there done that. Also been hurt by it, you all know what cheating and so on is, I guess. I didn't loose hope about it but I guess I'm a person wanting it and been needing it so much I almost hurt myself. I sometimes felt like I was in love with love. I just wanted it so bad.

Yes I've been in love, I've had boyfriends, long relationships, my heart broke after plans for future and so on. For a while it was kind off all done I had plans for engagement, marriage, kids, somewhere to live. Today I'm happy nothing worked out but honestly at that moment I really thought that without the one person my life was nothing, that I was nothing. That I couldn't do anything, as the small person I thought I was.

Now I finally understand that there's something deeper and stronger than any Love of what I ever known. Something that will always no matter what be in my heart. The love to God. Knowing that I wont be alone, ever. And that He loves me right back. I'm so strong in myself that I know that who ever will come in my life or go out of my life, there's one Love staying and that's the most important and the greatest one. It feel it, It's a awesome and amazing feeling. I'm so happy to finally understand this.

Off course I always loved my friends, family, cats and chocolate ;)

It's time to stop being so deadly serious,
picture time!!!!

Thanks for reading

I take sometimes more then hundreds of pictures everyday so its not tooo much hehe

just wanna end this whole thing in the best way possible with the best them all

Christoffer you're the sweetest :) Miss u loads! Haven't seen him over a year. Check his blog out he writes about his life and he's also a very talented dancer! Remember when we used to take dance classes together haha! See u in Hollywood ;)
http://chriswilliams.blogg.se/2012/october/andersson-pa-vifft.html#

I just came home from a beautiful amazing morning walk. Not very sunny and warm this morning but I love it, this area is so nice, there's flowers and plants that I never seen in my whole life. Just have to stop and take pictures of it. That's why I'm sooo active on Instagram for now cause I want everyone to see what I see, it's amazing! After I dropped off kiddos at school I felt like I wanted to enjoy this morning as much as possible so the best way was to take a walk and wow It was great I must say that.
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I said in the phone the other day to a friend that it feels like I'm walking on sunshine even if it at this moment was the darkest night, but It's very true. My head is almost exploding of thoughts and I feel like it's not right to keep it to myself. It feels like I'm suppose to write it all down so that's what I'm doing right now.

I'm aware that this is very personal information about my life, I actually hesitated before I decided to write it in my blog, since I know that anyone can read it, I first just wrote it all for myself in my phone.

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I also know now why my new Guitar that I've been waiting for weeks broke almost at the same moment as I got it. If I would have the chance to play with it this morning, I wouldn't have gone for the walk and this wouldn't have been written.
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I've been thinking a lot about me and money. I'm a spender, I would say that If I have money I'm always thinking how I will save it all and do good, but It's not really working that way. So today I really thought about it and why it's like this. And I came up with this, I should stop spending money on stuff that I don't really need more then necessary like cigarettes, alcohol, sweets or whatever. Of course I want to enjoy life but I know I have a lot, more then enough, more then some other people. If there's something I don't really need why should I spend money on it. If I pray for economy and health I have to make sure I'm doing the best I can, not expecting that It'll solve it self.

If I have money and will just spend it on something worthless then I can rather give it to someone that needs it more. I'm gonna try to save my money for trips now, cause I know that will do good for me and when I see more of the world I get more aware and then I can use that to be able to effect and help instead. It all sounds easy to say but I know this will be something to work on. I love shopping, to much haha.
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Next thing I was thinking about is food and eating disorders. Which is something that I guess not many knows but It's been something I've struggled with for years. I've done it all, anorexia (starving), bulimia, (throwing up), Binge Eating (over eat?) (hetsäta on Swedish). I view food very different from others and all of this has been in my head everyday. I've felt regret after almost every meal and I've felt proud if I did go a day or days without anything to eat at all.

I view this very different now, I believe now that I'm a creation of God and therefore I should treat myself and my body with respect. My body is my temple and a reflection of God. I can't longer look at myself and say; you're ugly, stupid etc. I can instead be thankful that I have the opportunity to eat whatever I want whenever I want. God created food as well and for our body to need it. You should take the chance you have to fill up with more energy, if you can when it's needed. So to eat to much or nothing at all is not showing that you appreciate and respect it.

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Even if I'm not 100 % there yet I'm really getting there and this is going great! I realized that If I don't respect myself, who will? I can say that I many times felt like I hated myself, how I look, what I do, that what I did was not good enough, everything. It's really changing, I feel like a new person, with new eyes to see with even If I'm same old Hanna.

I'm thankful and blessed with a life like this, it would be a shame not to life it to the fullest and be happy about it. Every morning I thank God for been given a new day. I wasn't always like that. It was more like, I wish that someone would come kill me right at the spot some mornings cause I wasn't even a little bit curious about what the day could give.
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 If I by telling others, opening up and sharing thoughts that I've have in my head it might help someone else that's in the same boat or are struggling with something. Maybe I can show you a new perspective and that might help, If I can I want to help, as much as possible.

Even if I still have things in my life that is not perfect and I know I'll face ups and downs the rest of my life I now have a bunch of tools that will help me deal with it another way! I respect other peoples view about life and solutions to problems and I learn something new everyday. But this is how feel that It makes sense.

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Finally I want to share this, this is the first thing I wrote this morning, but sometimes first will come last. I'm inspired from friends.

Nothing is awkward until you make it awkward. Nothing is complicated if you don't make it complicated. What is the worst thing that can happen? I don't even fear death anymore. I realize things that I already knew but I see it with new eyes, this is happening everyday.

I'm never alone, Jesus is always with me. Everything is already written so whatever happens I know that It's suppose to happen. I don't have to be stressed or worried because whatever is meant for me will not pass.
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Mormor:
Nu ska jag hjälpa dig hur du kan få ut det mesta och bästa om du är intresserad av mina inlägg eftersom jag nu skirver allt på engelska. Klicka på denna länk, eller kopiera länken och sätt i nytt fönster om det inte funkar http://translate.google.com/#en/sv/love%20you och du kan få allt översatt från engelska till svenska. Mejla mig om du inte får till det så kan jag beskriva mera.



This is pictures from my morning walk,
my adventure to a beach I went to yesterday close by
and some that I've upload on Instagram.
Enjoy

This is what I wrote in the beginning,

what is this ???? Never seen it, supercoool!

I guess I don't have to say that I love flowers :D

Thanks for taking your time reading