Fucking pissed the fuck offffffff

Hate this rematch process, I don't hate very often, BUT if I do, I really hate, A LOT........
okay I don't hate it,,, I dislike it, it makes me real sad :(

Serious, the family in Novato that I was gonna start working for must have some deciding problems, cause from one day to another she left a vocie mail saying that she had some second thoughts. And now she's like terrorizing my phone with all of this other voice mails that she wants me to come anyways.

Well,,, I'm out, it's to stressful and I don't want to move in to a family where everything is so complicated and unsure before I even started workin for em...

I'm sad and hurt because I keep hearing all this bullshit about me that reaches out to the new families about my looks like I have piercings and tattoos, that I have a boyfriend?????? stop wait a minute, since when did I have a boyfriend if you don't mind me asking? If you find him tell him to call me........

/

So fucking annoyed and mad and sad. I can't stand this BS anymore and I don't even wanna hear a single word more about me\, what I've done, how and look etc behind my back, If somebody has a problem, tell it to my face\, gosh plz.

Since they went out my au pair account I had a match from Michigan which is gone now today and another family from Novato but now it's empty. I have until Friday to find a family otherwise, HELLO Sweden..

I just want to be here, meet people, travel, get some life experience and have fun before my VISA runs out this October.. I know I'm a good au pair, I love kids and I put all my effort to the kids when I'm working, There must be a family that wants me to come.. 


\
On the bright side though....
no fuck it today there's no bright side......

So today I went to Novato California to meet my future host family. When I was on my way I didn't know what to expect or what was gonna happen. I was driving the car there and the only thing I had on my mind was like. For real.. I love cali I'm so not done leaving already .

I found their house like a 40 min drive from here. The house lovely, in the backyard they have a basketball court, swimming pool, playground and a tennis court that's all theirs. So crazy I couldn't believe my eyes. Met three of the five kids that in going to take care of all of them so nice.

I talked for a while with the host mom and the kids and we decided to agree that in from now on gonna be their au pair. Im so happy and super excited.

She wants me Monday already so we'll see what's up. Gotta talk to this family first. don't wanna leave them hanging and no fights. I almost packed all my stuff ready to go fo sho...

A lot of bullshit drama goin on right now so actually pretty happy this is all coming to an end I can handle it no more...

Life is good, I finally have a reason to blog again now everything is all good like it should be

Well serious it's like 4.20 in the morning just got home from a awesome day/evening.


My pillows screaming for some love

Alone at the house with two of the kids. My host mom is in NYC and my hostdad is unfortunately at the emergency with one of the kids. They're staying over night so ill stay here and help out. We thought he had the stomach flu since Saturday but he just didn't get any better. This morning I was so worried I asked my host dad to just take him in. He has a kidney infection poor little kid! Hope they can help him now so he'll get good again.

I've got a match with a family living 30 min from here in a place called Novato. Will probably meet the family tomorrow or this weekend to see if I maybe can be there au pair. It's 5 kids so a big family. Wish me luck

Rematch

Been feeling unwelcome and unhappy in this family since day one. Last week my host family said that its better if I find a new family to work for. It's official the papers r signed I'm out of here.

Have until the 15th to figure out what my next move is. Sweden? Back to Virginia ? Find a family In California ? Right now I ddont have a clue.

Have a vacation boon to Miami 1-6 April with some good friends wish that I still could go.

Hard to be in this situation feel sad divided and confused to be honest. Trying to keep smiling though